Bloodrayne 2?????

Again, I'm not kidding. Bloodrayne 2, the movie

Will whoever is financing Uwe Boll please cut it out.
Send me the money, if you must.
I will bear that burden

Tags:bloodrayne 2 Uwe Boll

Pot Delivery

I'm not kidding

heh.

Tags:pot delivery drugs

Duct Tape Doesn't Heal Warts

I guess it ISN'T the all powerful substance which binds the universe together

Tags:duct tape warts

See? Party games are for idiots and murderers!

Welcome to Worlds Dumbest People!

Tags:party games murder

Best...video...ever

I love dancing jesus


"Dancing Jesus, you have to watch the end of this video" on Google Video


Tags:dancing+jesus

I can't argue with their logic

(btw, please note that this draws inspiration from some seriously old school animation stylings)


Tags:Instant Karma Party

test email posting

hi there

--
Mom's Basement is my Secret HQ!
http://momsbasement.blogspot.com/

The Geektivist
http://geektivist.blogspot.com

Livejournal
http://mole_boy.livejournal.com

Ewe Boll: Boxer

Fighting Exe Boll

Heh...
our very own, present day, Ed Wood.
I think Ed would have gladly boxed for film.

Tags:Ewe Boll Ed Wood

Launch Ring

Best...Rollercoaster...EVER!

and we are one step closer to a rail gun.

Tags:launch ring rail gun

LucasFilms, Bribery, and Domain Names

LucasFilm had to bribe a fan for a Phantom Menace Domain Name

A wookie cosutme.
A WOOKIE COSTUME???
BOBA FETT, YOU TWIT, FETT! FETT!! FETT!!!

Tags:lucasfilm
Domain Name
Phantom Menace News wookie

Holy In The Corner Pocket, Batman!

Must...Have...Holy...Pool Stick!!!

Tags:Pool Stick Jesus Christ Virgin Mary

Dustin Diamond Does Dirty Sanchez

Oh Dustin...

I mean...just when you thought fame couldn't get any more surreal...

Tags:Dustin Diamond sex tape Dirty Sanchez

Tickle Me Elmo EXTREME

I'm not kidding

Should anything with Elmo ever be called 'Extreme'? (assuming that word should ever be used)

Tags:Tickle Me Elmo Extreme TMX

Shark vs Octopus

Shark vs Octopus

what more can be said?

from swingnut: My favorite octopus story involved one than was getting out of it's tank at night and getting into the crabs tank next to it for a little midnight snack. I was watching some documentry on the intelligemce of octopi and they were interviewing some guy who studied them in a lab. He said every morning there were crabs missing and they couldn't figure out how, much like the missing aquarium sharks, so the watched the lab one night and low and behold...

Tags:shark octopus

Barney's Penis

Barney Isn't Neutered

There's really nothing to say here except...

BWWAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Tags:Barney penis

As cool as an ipod?

From slashdot

a discussion of an upgraded mp3 player from sandisk:
Person 1:ya but....nothing will EVER be as cool as an ipod.

Person 2:How about Bruce Willis on a hoverboard listening to bootleg OGGs of
George Clinton and Parliament Funkadelic on a homemade altoids-tin
music player, kissing Salma Hayek, and fighting Christopher Walken,
Jet Li, the Rock, and an army of robot sharks with rocket-packs?

Person 1: almost, but the ipod still has a scroll wheel.

Tags:ipod Christopher Walken Salma Hayek Bruce Willis
slashdot

Do Not Call

Is the do not call list working?
So says yahoo:

Currently, 76% of Americans are signed up, meaning the number of victims a tele-intruder can bother, er, sell to, has fallen drastically. In fact, 87% of those who registered report getting fewer calls.

76%. Thats fantastic!
Now, maybe, we can get a Do Not Spam list?
Please?

Tags:Do Not Call List telemarketers

Rose Tyler: Earth Defence

Rose Tyler: Earth Defence
(a little more from Cinescape this morning)

"It was actually commissioned by the controller of BBC One and budgeted," series creator Russell T Davies told Doctor Who magazine, according to a report on the BBC Web site. But Davies later decided that the show, Rose Tyler: Earth Defence, was "a spinoff too far" and called it off.

a spinoff too far
bwaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahaha
(I really do love Rose)

Tags:Rose Tyler Billie Piper Doctor Who

Garth Ennis: The Boys

Garth Ennis and Darick Robertson Talk About "The Boys"

...the book is really about: the effect superheroes would have on society and history, if they really existed. And, of course, the effect that politics and corporate backing would have on them.

What...another one?
No, I'm not really bitching. Given that superhero comics can use just about any title that isn't strictly about bashing badguys, I'll take it.
The tone of Garth's comment just sounds as if he thinks this is the first comic of it's kind. And thats just not true.
Hells Bells, Garth, Booster frickin' Gold beat you to the corporate backing thing!

But I'll probably buy the trade

Tags:Garth Ennis
The Boys
Darick Robertson comics

Armor Of God

I'm not sure if I should laugh or get a set.
I mean...I'm pro any set of +3 pajamas I can get my hands on.

Tags:Armor Of God

SNAKES ON A PLANE

HAPPY SNAKES ON A PLANE DAY!!!

my review late tonight or early tomorrow.

Tags:Snakes On A Plane

Terrorism

Squirrel Suicide...Um...no...not quite bomber....

Crazed squirrel ransacks house

Press Association
Wednesday August 16, 2006

Guardian Unlimited
A family today told how a squirrel went berserk and trashed their house after falling down their chimney.

Retired engineer Alan White, 67, and his wife Janice, 65, came home from a weekend away to find their lounge had been ransacked, causing thousands of pounds worth of damage.

The couple initially feared burglars had broken into their home in Cheltenham, Gloucestershire, but the culprit was found to be a squirrel which had left sooty paw prints all over the room.

The trapped rodent had tried chewing through the window frames and tore the curtain and settee to shreds in a desperate bid to escape.

The couple's 38-year-old son found the lifeless body of the squirrel behind the settee.

"Once we realised that we looked more carefully for damage and saw the settee, which was quite a nice one, had been ripped and gnawed," said Mr White.

"Of course, the squirrel had been covered in soot falling down the chimney and everything, even the light on the ceiling, had been covered with soot by him.

"The curtains on both sides of the window had been torn to shreds and he had torn a big hole in the carpet."

Mr White said he and his wife had been to the International Balloon Fiesta in Bristol with their grandson Shaun, 13, and were greeted by the scene of carnage when they arrived back.

"There were pot plants and ornaments strewn across the room and we immediately thought someone had broken in. But my wife pointed out that the doors were still locked," he added.

Mr White said the squirrel had even tried to chew its way through the aluminium frame of the patio doors.

The family are relieved that the lounge doors were closed, preventing the trapped creature from running amok around their entire house.

The couple have been in contact with their insurance firm about the damage, and the lounge will have to be completely redecorated after the squirrel's rampage.

Mr White said he was now thinking about getting a chimney cowl fitted.

An RSPCA spokesman said the incident was very unusual. "We've heard of birds getting into houses but never a squirrel getting down a chimney. It's unfortunate for the family - and the squirrel," he said.


Tags:Terrorism Squirrel

Getting Bigger Boobies Can Save Your Life

'nuff said

Tags:breast implants Lebanon Israel Hezbollah

Knights Of The Old Republic II: The Sith Lords

I loved Knights Of The Old Republic.
A fantastic game, fun characters and dialog, and, of course, great force powers.
More so, you get to be evil.
I loved being evil.
My favorite part?
*inviso text*

making the wookie kill his friend
*end inviso text*

So last weekend, I bought KOTOR II: The Sith Lords.
This game is HUGE! I mean, it just never frickin' ended!
And that was just fine by me. I could never do enough evil.
It did get tiring, though...I mean, you'd finish a good 8 hour session and think, wearily:
But...but tomorrow there is still going to be more evil to do.

I may have to go back and play KOTOR again to really compare the two, but this game
felt more subtle, deeper in many ways. Especially the plot which wove in a good deal
of economics and politics.
The only downside was the ending. The last 'quest' just felt very abrupt, and the ending
was unsatisfying. A quick search shows that Obsidian (the developers) were pushed by
LucasArts to meet an XMas deadline so they cut the ending short, and left out lots of
other material. Apparently the basics for this stuff is still in the code and is being assembled
by people at Team Gizka. I'll be there.

Anyhow, big thumbs up, overall.
I think I'll go play Shadow Of The Colossus.


Tags:KOTOR II
Knights Of The Old Republic II: The Sith Lords

Treehouse as a secret lair

Our New Secret Lair
(yes, my secret HQ is now a secret lair)

Tags:treehouse

Smanuel L. Jackson on Snakes On A Plane

Samuel L Jackson interview about SOAP!

SAMUEL L. JACKSON: No! Hell, no! You want the snake hit! You want to see it. You have two people goin' to screw in a bathroom on a plane and you know that there are some snakes on there... you know that when that tit comes out, you want to see a snake on that tit! At some point you gonna go, "Man, I know a snake's going to show up somewhere... and hopefully that snake's going to be on that tit!"

Tags:Samuel L Jackson snakes on a plane SOAP interview

The Toast Song

TOAST

I'll be the last to say there's much redeeming about myspace, but you gotta hear this song!


Tags:myspace toast

Paris Hilton Celibate

The End Of An Era?
My favorite part:

The Hilton Hotels heir and uber-socialite told the magazine she is "very shy" and relates to the late Princess Diana, who was hounded by photographers.

I'm not sure what she's saying here. Is Paris saying that she feels like a person who used their fame and money to help those less fortunate, or is she calling Princess Di a media whore?

Tags:Paris Hilton sex celibate

STAR WARS DELETED SCENES

Scenes removed from Star Wars: A New Hope!
'nuff said.

Tags:star wars deleted scenes A New Hope

What a strange waste of time

Ban Comic Sans
What an odd campaign.
I wonder if they fall under a different IRS heading?

Tags:ban comic sans

You make the call

More scary or less scary?


(thanks BoingBoing)

Tags:Darth Vader Hello Kitty

TIMECUBE

Am I the last to hear about
TimeCube???
Who needs drugs when you have TimeCube??? (I could have saved a fortune)
I have to say that I've always been a little leary of the whole -1 x -1 = 1 thing, but now I'm confused. Is it July 30(2) or July 30(3)?


Tags:TimeCube

Born again!

Yes, you can become a born again atheist.
Though I'm not certain I'd call it that. It kind of implies that you have been born into a new world when, in fact, all you've done is drop the illusion you've been stuck with all your life.
Anyhow, I'd always been leaning towards atheism anyhow, but being in AA kind of drew me away for a while.

This revelation was brought about by reading several articles by Sam Harris, author of The End Of Faith.
He wasn't, for the most part, saying much I didn't already know, but what he DID manage to do was bring to the forefront feelings and views that I had not put into a concrete framework. He also showed me the hypocrisy of my actions.


List of Articles


The best has to be the Atheist Manifesto. Its long winded, but worth it if only for this paragraph:

It is perfectly absurd for religious moderates to suggest that a rational human being can believe in God simply because this belief makes him happy, relieves his fear of death or gives his life meaning. The absurdity becomes obvious the moment we swap the notion of God for some other consoling proposition: Imagine, for instance, that a man wants to believe that there is a diamond buried somewhere in his yard that is the size of a refrigerator. No doubt it would feel uncommonly good to believe this. Just imagine what would happen if he then followed the example of religious moderates and maintained this belief along pragmatic lines: When asked why he thinks that there is a diamond in his yard that is thousands of times larger than any yet discovered, he says things like, “This belief gives my life meaning,” or “My family and I enjoy digging for it on Sundays,” or “I wouldn't want to live in a universe where there wasn't a diamond buried in my backyard that is the size of a refrigerator.” Clearly these responses are inadequate. But they are worse than that. They are the responses of a madman or an idiot.


Atheist Manifesto

These articles etc, also helped me realize that my tolerance when it came to other people's faith was misplaced. I don't have to (nor should I) respect their faith. I do (and should) respect their right to believe it.
What does this mean?
It means that I certainly don't burn churches or try to make laws preventing practice of religion. I let people believe what they want and behave how they will, so long as no one gets hurt.
It also means that if someone brings a god or supernatural faith into a discussion, I can treat it with the same weight as if they said "A big blue ocelot told me so".

Tags:atheism Sam Harris god religion

Just call me Reverend!

Not kidding!
As of today I am a Minister in the Universal Life Church!
As Reverend Joel, I am empowered:
. To perform marriages within any US state, following the rules laid out by the state in which
you wish to perform said marriage.

. To perform funerals, baptisms, last rites or any other sort of legal ceremony or ritual you
wish to perform, except circumcision.

. To start a church of your own, be it a bricks and mortar building or on the internet.

. To absolve others of their sins as you have been absolved of yours.


This is particularly ironic in that today I became a born again atheist.
Will wonders never cease?

Tags:reverend ordained atheist

Poor, Poor Lobsters

by way of
DailyKos Cheers and Jeers

CHEERS to Yankee Ingenuity. On this date in 1872, the doughnut cutter was patented by John F. Blondel of Thomaston, Maine. Only after his early experiments on lobsters went disastrously wrong.

Tags:Lobsters doughnut

Stranger than fiction

Is life really stranger than fiction???

Tags:Snakes On A Plane Snakes In A Cockpit

I wish someone would send ME an internet...

This is someone who makes policy???

My favorite quote (and there were many):
"I just the other day got, an internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday and I just got it yesterday."

I dunno. Sending an internet really might take a couple days.
I mean, there's ALOT of porn out there.
next time he should use BitTorrent.

Tags:net neutrality Ted Stevens Senator Stevens

Meerkat Manor

Meerkat Manor
So there's the show coming up on Animal Planet called Meerkat Manor.
Now, please note, this is not a single show.
Its a reality series.
We will spend an entire season following a heard? flock? or whatever of meerkats around.
I like meerkats. They are cute and adorable.
But exactly how many episodes can one watch?
"Oh, look, she's standing on her hind legs, again!"
"Hey, watch how they use their hands to eat, again."
I think they'll have to get a little more clever.
Narrarator: Watch, now, as a badger entires the tribe's area.
*shot of badger in cage being released*
Narrarator: The badger delves into the meerkat burrow.
*shot of badger being forced into hole with stick*
Narrarator: This looks like a bad day for our friends.
Thats my kind of show.

Next week, Meerkat Meets Gator!!

Tags:meerkat meerkat manor animal planet Reality TV

Religious discrimination

Soldier's shouldn't be wiccans, apparently

Tags:wicca

Horrid?

How is this any more horrid than GTA III (vice city or whatever)

because we know the names of these people?

hm.

Tags:columbine video game

See No Evil

See No Evil

This is kind of a weird question, but have you ever thought there should be a movie about a big bald retarded muscleman with extreme religious views running around an abandoned hotel banging people against walls and plucking their eyeballs out? If so, today's your lucky day, and SEE NO EVIL is your movie.

Tags:See No Evil

Apple

24/7 Apple Store

Say what you want, apple knows how to market...its gorgeous!

Tags:Apple

Why should I get rid of my cat?

BIG KITTY!!!
yes, but for most animals, 'unpredictable' doesn't imply being turned into lunch:

When asked whether he considers his lion to be inherently dangerous, Collins insisted that any pet can behave unpredictably.

yes, but for most animals, 'unpredictable' doesn't imply being turned into lunch:

"I think it needs to be in a different environment," Hall said. "Everybody here keeps their guns loaded."

yeah, big surprise, its frickin' kentucky

Tags:lion kentucky

Pat Robertson: Meterologist

Pat Robertson Agrees With Weathermen!

The Rev. Pat Robertson says God has told him that storms and possibly a tsunami will hit America's coastline this year.

Or, alternately, you could listen to what the scientists have been saying all year.
Whichever.
Nice when religion backs science.

Tags:Pat Robertson

SOAP

YES!!!
I was watching last night's Daily Show with Jon Stewart and he made a SNAKES ON A PLANE JOKE!!!
YES!!!
*in George Bush Voice*
I have just heard on the internet...there are snakes on a plane.

Tags:Snakes On A Plane The Daily Show Jon Stewart

"I'm Psychic" is a defense

Susan Polk Is Psychic, so its OK

There's no reason to doubt murder defendant Susan Polk's claim that she stabbed her husband in self-defense, and also that she is a psychic, an expert witness told jurors Tuesday.
...
"My understanding is that she's got considerable psychic ability and there's no reason to doubt that," [Retired forensic pathologist Dr. John] Cooper said. "Maybe you don't believe in psychic ability."

Now, whether you been in psychic ability or not, trying to use it in your defense is, in a word, nuts.
Personally, I think two things:
1) Ms. Polk has given up and is trying to set herself up for appeal on the basis that she was incompetant to be her own counsel
2) Dr. Cooper should stay retired.

Tags:Susan Polk Psychic Medium

Taxes

Something is upsetting me.
Taxes.
No, not the paying, thereof, but the complaining.
By the rich about paying a higher percentage than the poor.
Now, don't get me wrong. I hate paying them.
But, people who know more about economics than I do tell me that a gradiated tax system is the best way to go. I know little about economics, so I listen to them.
If someone can show me a flat tax system that gets the government all the money it needs without unduly burdening the poor, I'll listen.
That said...
What I can't stand is when those who make 250K a year bitch that their tax bracket is higher than people who make 35K a year.
They still make a gazillion dollars, don't they?
If anyone has a right to bitch, its people who make about what I do. I do pretty OK, but I'm hardly high-on-the-hog. If *I* am OK with my bracket, doesn't it sound petty for those making well into 6 figures to complain about how unfair it is to them?
As always, its the middle class that takes the brunt of things, and the wealthy who complain about them.

Tags:taxes

SNAKE ISLAND

Oil pipeline explosion kills up to 200 in Nigeria

Nigerian officials say the pipe exploded on Snake Island.

how cool is it that Nigeria has a place called Snake Island???
(actually, the name is misleading. Its really a peninsula)

Tags:Nigeria oil pipeline explosion Snake Island

Da Vinci Code

Christians Compare Questioning The Story Of Jesus To The Holocaust

In Rome recently, Archbishop Angelo Amato, the No. 2 official in the Vatican's doctrinal office, told Catholic communications officials: "If such slanders, offenses and errors had been directed at the Koran or the Holocaust, they would have justly provoked a world uprising. Instead, directed at the Church and Christians, they remain unpunished. I hope you will all boycott the movie."

Now, I have zero issue with Christians protesting the movie, however, comparing the questioning of the life of Jesus to Holocaust Revisionism is just not quite sane.
If nothing else, there are people who actually personally remember the Holocaust (it was only 60 years ago).
A more appropriate comparison would have been Jesus vs Moses.
People look back at history and question it all the time. The older the history, the more likely it is to have picked up some, shall we say, misleading information.
The only reason to say that questioning the story of Jesus is akin to questioning the accounts of the Holocaust is to assume that the Bible is infalible and so on equal grounds with the objective, verifiable data on the holocaust, as well as the personal accounts, which is fine, but one can't expect non-christians to believe that.
On the plus side, all the demonstrations and actions (except for one nutso group in India who is planning to starve themselves to death) are peaceful.
The core meaning behind it is: Just because the movie is out there, doesn't mean you have to go see it.

And thats EXACTLY how this is supposed to work.
(as opposed to, say, burning down buildings)

Tags:Da Vinci Code

Real Life Email

J: only saw this once, but there was a great commercial for
Nintendogs. Shows some 12 or 13 year old boy playing with his
Nintendog, which starts to bark because it senses other Nintendogs
around. HA-ZAH! its his sisters girlfriends coming over to play.
ANd, of course, his Nintendog gives him an 'in'
I'd have bought that in 2 seconds.

--
M:wow, that *is* a good commercial. of course, now I can add the
classic "buy some wine coolers + menthols" component to the mix and...

... no, best i don't say aything more.
--
J:yes, please don't.
As I work on a military base, the last thing I need is someone showing
up here to ask me about our plans to seduce little girls.
--
M:what, a guy can't smoke menthols and drink wine coolers and play
nintendogs in the privacy of his own house? What are you, some kind
of freedom-hating monster?

leave us not forget that *i'm* not the one who used to live across the
street from the catholic school, mister.

(hmm. i thought the google ads for this were going to be more exciting)
--
J:I believe I have made it clear that yes, I am a freedom-hating monster.
However, the school wasn't my fault.
And what red-blooded american guy WOULDN'T sit out on the porch with
some booze and wearing a speedo at 3:15 each day?

(yeah, I'm getting DDR ads up the ass)
---
M:i hear the kids love DDR. love it a lot.
---
J:I'm not kidding.
I'm really disappointed in google-ads
---
M: Oh, i'm seeing them too: i'm really not that surprused: after all, I
did mention DDR previously, and it *is* a pretty big cash cow, and now
it's just getting mentioned further, so, as far as it is concerned, we
must really be interested in it.

Still, we *definitely* should have a little more variety in ads.
---
J:It would appear google ads has something of a one-track mind.

wait.

penis enlargement.

mortgages

dental work
---
M:I got free ringtones! Good job! (though i'm not sure where that came from...)

let's see, what else.

viagra

cialis

free imac

canadian pharmacy
---
J:whoa
you killed google ads
have NOTHING
---
M: that's just impressive, if you stop and think about it: probably the
glut of keywords in a single email thread just crashed a server..

"must... display.. ads... cannot.. choooooooosee...."
---
J: now I'm just scared.

dating

girls

lesbian
---
M:oh my god, i think we *really* killed it.

weight loss

rolex watches

paris hilton
---
J: brangelina

scientology

ninjew

car loan
---
M: IT'S NOT WORKING!!! THE INTERNET IS DYING!!!
---
J: FUCK!!!

Look, without google ads, how will I know what books and hair care
products and various services I might enjoy learning more about?

How will I know where to find singles in my area?

What will become of my near-obsessive need to get the lowest interest
rate on my various loans regardless as to the processing fee?

HOW WILL I KNOW HOW TO MAKE MONEY FROM SURVEYS????
---
M: apparently, you're just shit out of luck now.

You're just going to have to go to the store, and consume at random

try a local bar

call that guy in the question mark suit

and you can't, dumabss

(respectively)
---
J: so...quiet...like dead air on the radio. creepy.

** follow up once I mentioned I was going to post this**
M: hey, when you get to the part about seducing little girls. can you
please change my name to, like, i dunno, Lance or something?

actually, wait, it would make more sense if my name didn't change in
the middle of the conversation - that would probably make me look even
worse.

M: "Nintendogs is cool!"
J: "I agree"
Lance: "You can use it to seduce little girls"
J: "What?"
M: "Nothing."

Yeah, that would look weird.

Tags:google-ads

Lesbians are wired differently

LOOK! More facts about homosexuality that will be ignored by the religious right

film at 11...

Tags:homosexuality gay lesbian

RUN FOR THE HILLS!!!

Flying robot attack "unstoppable": experts

I shit you not. That really is the title.
To which I can only say...
D'UH!!!

Tags:robots

Conversations I didn't have, but probably could

S: Kim brought her baby in last week. It appeared to be a functioning
small human

F: Look at her -- she's so unimpressed! If Kim had brought in a
new kitten, it would have been all excitement -- look at the new kitten,
it's so cute, googie goo, you're so cute [this last said in baby-talk]

S: well...

F: Or "look! Kim brought in the new Life game!" In this game, you
have a baby, and you take care of it just like in real life! Look how
cute the baby is [pantomimes baby on computer screen]

S: but...

F: But a REAL baby -- eh, shove it in the corner and keep it quiet. I
have to do the ordering.

R: Was it a boy or a girl?

S: I don't know.

[Pandemonium]

Conversations I never thought I'd have

Intro: My girlfriend (S) and I (J) had dinner at our friends Todd and Sybil's house
for the first time a few weeks back which was really nice. Its been a
long time since I made friends at work. We decided that we should have
them over to our place. Here is a conversation I had with S about what
to serve.
S: I want to make something so impressive that no one cares how it
tastes.
(note: this is a strange thing for her to say as she is a fantastic
cook)
J: OK
S: How about one of those pies that when you open it, birds fly out?
J: You mean like 4 and 20 blackbirds?
S: exactly! I found a recipe for it today in my Food in History book!
J: Well, first, that would be a very big pie.
S: Yes.
J: Second, I'm not sure where I could buy 24 blackbirds.
S: We could use budgies. 4 or 5.
*I think about this for a moment*
J: So what you are really doing is making a magic trick, as opposed to,
say, dessert.
S: No. It would be Impressive. And it would be a meat pie for dinner.
J: The problem is we are then left without having any pie.
S: That's the best part! We put a smaller pie inside that we could then
eat!
J: Yes. I'd definitely be interested in eating pie that had been
trapped with scared little birds for a while. That would certainly be
tasty. You know what birds do right before they take off?
S: What?
J: They drop some ballast.
S: ?
J: they take a dump.
S: Oh. We could wrap the little pie in plastic wrap.
J: Well, one, the talons from the budgies would surely rip it open.
And two, I am not sure I'd be interested in eating pie wrapped in
plastic that was covered in guano.
S: Guano is bat shit, not bird shit. If you're worried about the birds
tearing the saran wrap, we could lightly dope them so that they'd be
just coming around when we open the pie.
J: You know nothing about doping birds, you'd probably kill them.
S: I could look it up on the Internet. I can't be the first person to
need lightly doped budgies.
J: Still, no one would want to eat the pie even if it's wrapped in
Saran Wrap, if it's then covered in birdshit.
S: FINE! We keep the little pie separate from the big pie, hidden in
the kitchen.
J: Sybil is 8 months pregnant, do you think she needs a shock at this
stage?
S: Not a shock! Impressive!
J: We would end up with happy cats though.
S: HAPPY KITTIES!
J: And very tense budgies.
S: HAPPY KITTIES!
J: And a home covered with guano.
S: Guano is BAT shit!
J: I suppose we could then use the budgies for target practice,
especially as they came out.
S: SKEET!
J: A couple BB guns, it could be big fun.
S: YES! BIG FUN!
J: Which still leaves us with no pie.
S: We have the small pie!

*yes, this continued on... And on... And on...*

Review: Infinite Crisis

A couple years back, DC, in its annual tradition of massive crossover events, put out Our World At War.
I read the collected volumes (as I am want to do) and it was...OK.
Maybye if I'd read ALL of the issues, ALL of the crossovers, ALL of the titles it ran through, well, maybe then I'd have loved it.
The problem was that...well...it just didn't feel as big as it should have.
It didn't feel important.
It didn't feel epic.
Infinite Crisis.
Wow.
I mean...
OK.
Stop.
Let me start out by saying what I didn't/don't like about all this.
1) the lead in mini-series (except for Identity Crisis) were badly done and, ultimately, pointless. There was nothing that couldn't have been done in a few extra issues. Worse, they were boring and contrived (for the most part).

2) The new Blue Beetle, and his role in this, was very deus ex machina.
3) The One Year Later/52 stuff. Not happy at all. Don't like being forced to read the individual issues to stay in synch.
4) The obvious ploy to make you read titles you don't care about (for example, I give not a rat's ass about Bludhaven)
5) The art was inconsistent
that said

wow.
Seven issues that I just never wanted to see end. It was huge. Epic. Powerful. While I haven't fully understood the outrage over the whole mind-wipe thing (y'know, Dr. Light was a violent psychopath who raped women...fuck him), the emotion behind it all came through clearly.
The world (or, really, worlds) was in danger, peril, everything was in the balance.
At it's core, though, this was a story that has been coming for a while.
It was a story about the darkness of the Warren Ellis' type heros vs the simplistic 1950s heros. A dark grey world vs a black and white one.
It was a story that sets the stage for heros who live in something like the real world, a place with murderers who keep murdering, with villains who never go away for good, with planet devouring monsters, and how they find a way to handle these threats effectively, but still shine as an example of what mankind can and should be.
The seeds have been placed for deeper, more complex heros.
But ones who can also inspire.
Lights in the darkness.

It remains to be seen how those seeds will grow.

Tags:[tagname]

Not Really A Review: Earthboy Jacobus

This really isn't a review, just a couple comments.
I just finished reading Earthboy Jacobus by Doug Tennapel. He also wrote Creature Tech that I wrote about earlier.
This one is OK. Not as good as CT, but hey, high bar and all.
Anyhow, its a pretty touching and very patriotic story about an odd boy and his adoptive dad fighting off an alien invasion, sort of.
The only real problem I had was on one page.
A human preacher, who has been transformed into an alien stooge says something like "I now see that all struggle can be broken down into economic terms and I no longer need an imaginary divine entity to act as my drug to keep me in line."
Translation: the aliens are commie bastards.
Personally, I have no real problem with the idea of aliens representing communists. Its a bit out-dated, but thats OK.
The problem is that the scene is, pretty much, talking down to the readers. Telling rather than showing. Its just bad writing.
The other problem I have with alien=marx-toy is this:
the aliens invade planet after planet, gobbling up all the resources to feed the never sated god-monster that leads them.
Really, this isn't communism.
Its American Capitalism.
Its capitalism thats the shark, devouring everything and always needing more.
Its capitalism that consumes resources without leaving anything behind.


Tags:doug tennapelEarthboy Jacobus

New Reality Show

My new favorite reality show

Morgan, a caustically engaging fellow, isn’t crazy. He uses the urine jar because there’s only one bathroom in his dingy New York domicile, and his mom is in there a lot. (Morgan’s life kind of sucks.)

Tags:Can't Get A DateReality TV VH1

This makes me more sad than angry

Oh for the days when it was OK to beat up fags

no...just sad...

Tags:homosexuality

I AM ZOMBIE KING!!!

Live Every Day As...

Now, normally, I think the onion has turned into a repetative, one-gag site (or is that redundant?), but it has now provided me with my new philosophy for life

Tags:The Onion Zombies Philosophy

Purity Ball

Purity Ball

This event, recently held in South Dakota (courtesy of the Abstinence Clearinghouse), can pretty much be summed up as Ritualistic Surrender of My Sexuality to Daddy. At the Purity Ball, girls don prom dresses to be escorted by their fathers to a Dominionist's wet dream of a formal dance where dad and daughter pose for prom-style pictures under a heart-shaped arch of balloons.

ok, I was one of those people "who pooh-pooh the notion that abortion restrictions and abstinence movements are, at their cores, solely about controlling women's sexuality"
While I'm not saying that all anti-abortion/abstinence people are so motivated, I can't deny that these purity balls' are acts of control over women (as mentioned, there are no such customs for boys) and their sexuality.
While I can applaud the attempts to guide a daughter's sexual behavior, I can't help but see this as a 'women are still only women, not men' kind of thing.
Face it, girls, daddy owns your cunt and then hubby does.

(ok, that first bit is really disturbing)

Tags:abstinence Sex Ed Purity Ball

mmmm...sane

Speak No Evil

BELGRADE, Serbia-Montenegro (AP) - A Serbian prisoner using needle, thread and safety pins stitched his lips and tongue together to avoid a scheduled court hearing in his robbery case, the Blic newspaper reported Saturday.

(I don't even know how to tag this for technorati)
Tags:belgrade crazy people Zoran Raskovic

DON'T MESS WITH TV!!!

Nope, you HAVE to watch the commercials
basically, the system looks for flags that are generally used to increase interactivity with TV (i.e. 'more information', 'extra footage', etc):

Philips suggests adding flags to commercial breaks to stop a viewer from changing channels until the adverts are over. The flags could also be recognised by digital video recorders, which would then disable the fast forward control while the ads are playing.

Tags:TV

Doug TenNapel on DaVinci

Relativising The DaVinci Code
Basically, Doug (who, btw, wrote the fantastic Creature Tech I reviewed a while back) is saying that you can really get away with offending Christians but not so much with, say, Jews or Blacks. Offend Jews, you are an anti-semite or, at the very least, culturally insensitive. Offend Christians, and you are standing up for free speech.
Obviously it isn't quite that simple, but he does have a point which I've agreed with for a while.
However
He chooses some really poor examples to illustrate this point.
He uses the holocaust, slavery, and child molesting.
Unfortunately for his very legitamate arguement, these don't actually work here.
Sorry, Doug, but while I know you believe in the life of Jesus Christ as fact, your faith doesn't cut it against the historical facts of the holocaust and slavery (and the current facts of child molesting). Regardless of how much evidence there may be for the existence of Jesus as portrayed in the Bible, it falls short of academic standards, and certainly pales when compared to events in the 19th and 20th century.

You would have been better off finding parallels in these cultures and the stories (factual or otherwise) that create their collective identities. For example, a movie where Moses was just trying to scam the Jews and accidently stumbled into Israel. Thats much closer to the DaVinci Code, I think.

Oh, here's one, what if someone made a movie about how the Jews gathered together to slaughter Jesus for their own self-interest and to take away the salvation of his followers?
oh
sorry
already done.

that little jibe aside, I think my point still stands.

Tags:Doug TenNapel DaVinci Code

SOON!!!

Brain Link Hat!!!

Soon I'll be able to control all the HQ defenses with a thought!
WORLD DOMINATION TIME!!!

Dolphins

Mistress Of The Basement sent this (from the onion):

"Despite theories that dolphins are excellent communicators, they responded to questions on land with only labored wheezing and shrill, distressed screams."

SAD DOLPHINS!!!!!!!!

To which I could only reply:

not for long.

Tags:dolphins Mistress

Gays should be celibate

Bush's Policy

Abstinence curricula must have a clear definition of sexual abstinence which must be consistent with the following: “Abstinence means voluntarily choosing not to engage in sexual activity until marriage. Sexual activity refers to any type of genital contact or sexual stimulation between two persons including, but not limited to, sexual intercourse.”
...
Throughout the entire curriculum, the term “marriage” must be defined as “only a legal union between one man and one woman as a husband and wife, and the word ’spouse’ refers only to a person of the opposite sex who is a husband or a wife.” (Consistent with Federal law)"

It seems to me that, really, the only way to make sure no sexual stimulation takes place between gays is to keep an eye on them. And the best way to do that, it seems, is to, y'know, gather them into relocation living facilities. Anyhow, they'd be happier there amoung their own kind, and safer too! Yes, it'll be for their own good. Maybe we could give these places some sort of happy-fun name...
hm.
Yes, we can call them camps!


Tags:George W. Bush gays abstinance sex education

Proving God

Proving God, trying to prove God, is a pointless, ugly, misguided thing to do.
It's faith that is important.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase."
Martin Luther King, Jr.

Michelle Malkin...twit+1

MORE THUGGERY IN SANTA CRUZ

Vandals struck at least six sport utility vehicles Saturday night on the Westside, slashing tires and spray-painting politically charged messages such as "Oil equals blood" and "Guzzle" on the side of the vehicles, authorities said.

interesting.
Throwing paint at cars is thuggery.
What is throwing blood at women getting abortions?
bombing clinics?
interesting.

Tags:Michelle Malkin

More interesting things to watch

Tourettes Guy
Apparently a guy with Tourettes and alcoholism.
Sad, but potentially amusing

Tags:tourettes

More interesting things to watch

Tourettes Guy
Apparently a guy with Tourettes and alcoholism.
Sad, but potentially amusing

Tags:tourettes

TAG!!

How cool is THIS???

Mark Ecko tags Air Force One!

I can't wait to get home and watch this!

Tags:Mark Ecko Tagging Air Force One Homeland Security graffiti Still Free

German's Hate It When People Remember

No, You Can't See Our Papers

Some German officials and other people argue that disclosing intimate details about the fates of concentration camp inmates and slave laborers would violate their right to privacy.

Shockingly, the Germans (though very ready to give the U.S. shit for our treatment of the Native Americans) aren't real big on letting the world see the detailed documentation on their systematic extermination of entire races of people.
I can't imagine why.

Tags:germany holocaust

Recent Obsession

sorry for this recent obsession.
Mostly its a fascination with Scientology.
Not because the beliefs are so crazy (though they are...but one has to wonder if those beliefs are any crazier than, say, believing in a man who died and rose 3 days later and, somehow, through this process, cleansed mankind of all sin...), but because it seems to drive people so nuts.
Then again, I can't forget, say, Fred Phelps, Jerry Falwell, and so forth...
Outside of the expense of belonging to the Church Of Scientology, can anyone point out a significant distinction between that and Christianity?


Tags:scientology christianity religion

Still crazy after all these years

Nope, Tommy is still wacked

The conversation was all smiles until reporter Björn Benkow insisted that experts say that dyslexia cannot be cured by Scientology as Cruise has claimed. There was an awkward pause, then Cruise burst into laughter. “I’m going to, in any case, admit that you have the courage of a madman,” according to our translator.

So, to disagree with Tom is to have the courage of a madman. I wonder...did Jim Jones say similar things? David Koresh?

Then the reporter mentioned Kidman and the two children that she and Cruise adopted. “Now you’ve gone over the line,” Cruise replied.

Tom...when oh when will you learn that being a star means your past is always with you?
And, btw, its OK to be gay.

Tags:Tom Cruise Scientology

FINALLY, a sense of humor

Tom wants to have a placenta nosh

Yeah, ok, now he's just fucking with us.
Could our little tommy finally be developing a sense of humor again?
(btw, would this be considered cannibalism?)

Tags:Tom Cruise Katie Holmes Scientology placenta Cannibalism

Rumsfeld has some good qualities

Rumsfeld has some good qualities

Gen. Peter Pace, chairman of the U.S. Joint Chiefs of Staff, also defended Rumsfeld this week, telling reporters that "nobody works harder than he does."
"People can question my judgment or his judgment, but they should never question the dedication, the patriotism and the work ethic of Secretary Rumsfeld," Pace said Tuesday.

now, don't get me wrong...YAY DEDICATION, WORK ETHIC, PATRIOTISM!
but, y'know, shouldn't intelligence and judgement really be in there?
I mean, for a good strong recommendation?
I'm just sayin'...

Tags:Rumsfeld Iraq

And if today weren't odd enough...

Beans Make Stinky!

Tags:beans

Creepiest Christians EVER

Crucifixions

At least 11 Filipino devotees were nailed to the cross in two Philippine villages during annual Good Friday re-enactments of Jesus Christ's final hours, organizers said...including Ruben Enaje, a 45-year-old commercial sign maker, who was nailed to the cross for the 20th time.

I don't even know what to say here

Tags:christianity Crucifixion Catholic Philippines SAN PEDRO CUTUD

War On Drugs Is Against Conservative Politics

Please End The Drug War

As I've said before, on how many issues do Jesse Jackson, George Soros, Walter Cronkite, the ACLU, Cato, Bill Buckley, George Shultz and the Heritage Foundation agree?

Tags:War On Drugs

Mohammed Terrorists Win Again

Comedy Central Caves

"I just got off the phone with a Comedy Central spokesman. I asked him about last night's episode of South Park in which, at a moment right before the prophet Mohammed was supposed to make a cameo, the words, "Comedy Central has refused to broadcast an image of Mohammed on their network" appeared on the screen. I asked him whether this truly was Comedy Central's decision or whether this was just another gag (with South Park, you never know). He said: 'They reflected it accurately. That was a Comedy Central decision.' Just in case there was any confusion, that settles it. Comedy Central censored the image."***

one word: cowards

Tags:comedy central South Park Mohammed Islam

Which Jon???

Wrong Jon Stewart Gets Booked

n embarrassed charter school has discovered it booked the wrong Jon Stewart for its annual gala. The DaVinci Academy thought it had made a deal with comedian Jon Stewart, star of "The Daily Show" and host of this year's
Academy Awards, to appear next week.
...
But last week, it learned that it had booked Jon A. Stewart, a former motivational speaker, businessman and part-time professional wrestler from Chicago.

This reminds me of a Spring Fling concert at UMass Amherst one year.
Queen Latifah had been booked (circa 1990 or so).
Apparently, her agent or whatever, assumed it was UMass Amherst, New York.
d'oh!

Tags:Jon Stewart DaVinci Academy Utah Queen Latifah

Thank God For Warren Ellis

Batshit Crazy

True story: in 1973, heiress Susan Branaman died a cancer-riddled, smackhead hooker. Her rich friends -- who paid for her cancer treatment but seemed not to be around during the whole smackhead hooker thing -- arranged her funeral and had her cremated.

And then snorted her ashes out of little silver bowls.

Tags:Warren Ellis

California Censorship

Manga Censored

Bill Postmus, Chairman of the Board of Supervisors of suburban San Bernadino County, California, has ordered the county's libraries to remove the scholarly text Manga: Sixty Years of Japanese Comics from circulation. He proudly announced the move, calling the book "obscene comics," on the county's Website, saying, "That book is absolutely inappropriate for a public library and as soon as I was made aware of it yesterday, I ordered it to be removed immediately."

Now, don't get me wrong, I certainly think that this book shouldn't be in the kids section, but if libraries are only going to carry books that
1) are appropriate for all age groups
2) offend no one
then the shelves will be filled with copies of various Babar books and works by Robert Fulghum

Tags:manga censorship

Goths Might Actually Not Be Completely Useless

Being Goth Is Good For Kids???

My psyche won't let me quote this.

Tags:goth self-mutilation

Howard Leaves A Vacuum?

Whats Happening Now That Howard Is Gone?

And some rock stations, such as WAAF-FM in Boston, began promoting new online guides for "virgin" listeners to get them up to speed on the show's colorful characters.

Maybe, just maybe, instead of creating a show where you need cliff notes, they should, y'know, play some music.
It's so crazy it just might work.
(Yes, I know, putting a couple of slightly retarded people on the air who weren't funny at all SEEMED like a good idea, but, really, it's just cruel)

Tags:Howard Stern Radio satellite

The Lactose Intolerant Are Genetically Inferior

Speedy Evolution

"The time scale for a strongly favored mutation to sweep through a population is about 5,000 years," said Jonathan Pritchard, a University of Chicago evolutionary biologist. "It's hard to get an exact estimate for rates of change, but we know that the lactase gene is evolving the fastest in humans. It was new 5,000 years ago and now it's in virtually everybody in Europe."

The lactase gene is what allows humans to metabolize dairy products as adults. It's widely believed to have evolved in response to humans' domestication of dairy animals -- individuals who could enhance their diet with dairy products had such a strong survival advantage that the gene spread at the speed of, well, several thousand generations.

Tags:evolution Lactose Intolerant

Strange Google Links

A friend of mine has the following tagline:
"Peace - Its not just for Christmas Anymore"
Which causes Google to generate the following links in gmail.
Funny logic:
---
Leg Lamp Sale
It's Major Award Red Rider Leg Lamps
www.redriderleglamps.com

Jean Shepherd On Radio
Original performances from author of A Christmas Story on audio CD
www.RadioAgain.com

A Christmas Story 40 Leg
Get this popular toy free. Free w/free shipping. Sign up now.
www.FreeGiftWorld.com

Christmas Story, Leg Lamp
Replica Xmas Story Leg Lamp $39.88 from the movie classic at SHOP.COM
www.SHOP.COM

Tags:Google Gmail AdSense

Review: Beast Wars

Transformers: Beast Wars Seasons One, Two, Three

I Netflixed this on a whim. I'd watched i decent chunk of it before and recalled enjoying it AND I absolutely
love watching TV on DVD.
This ended up being no small event.
I got Season One.
2 DVDs at a time.
Watched them and NEEDED more.
I upgraded to 4 DVDs at a time.
I moved things around in my queue.
And got fucked.
Whatever snapshot they took of my queue had Beast Machines in the first slots.
Ugh.
I immediately returned Beast Machines.
And then received Season 2, disc 2, Season 3, disc 1, Season 3, disc 2.
No Season 2, disc 1.
ARGH!
Anyhow, I eventually got it.
That said...
I love this show.
It does play by certain conventions (the heros never take the offensive, the villians never really follow through, and are unable to really work together) but within that context, it does an amazing job of storytelling.
Some of the heros have their own agendas (i.e. DepthCharge's need for vengence against Protoform X) and the villains are often truely insane (i.e. Inferno is QUITE FUCKING NUTS and more than a little funny and Megatron ain't exactly stable either). Its also very funny at times, and toss out its share of references (in one episode, they refer to the Stainless Steel Rat, Die-Casting, and Dr. Strangelove). There's also a certain amount of internal awareness (i.e. sometimes they refer to Teletran One as Teletron One, and this gets very consciously corrected in one of the final episodes).
The series has just enough continuity to make it engrossing without making it convoluted, and the subplots can take several episodes to work out, if not seasons.
By the end, the struggle has become epic and archetypal. They bring in prophecies and biblical references. You feel as they do, that reality hangs in the balance.
What really fascinates me is that so much of this was completely improvised. The Season One set comes with interviews with a couple of the director/writers and the 'fess up to not having had even a clear idea of what planet the series takes place on, and so when this series ties in with the G1 series so perfectly, well, you can't do anything but be impressed. Oh, and you also find out that these guys knew virtualy nothing about the G1 series.

Heros die, villains die, alliances shift, characters grow and change. The story evolves and becomes more and more of...well...whatever it is that stories become.
BIG THUMBS UP.
Next week, Beast Machines!


Tags:Transformers Beast Wars DVD review Beast Machines

AT&T RAPES THE CONSTITUTION

AT&T Forwards Internet Traffic to NSA

"The evidence that we are filing supports our claim that AT&T is diverting Internet traffic into the hands of the NSA wholesale, in violation of federal wiretapping laws and the Fourth Amendment," said EFF Staff Attorney Kevin Bankston.

So, Bush isn't the only danger to the Constitution and Civil Liberties

Tags:AT&T NSA Civil Liberties eavesdropping Internet Constitution

ANOTHER BLOW TO CREATIONISM!!!

Bite me.

(yeah, this is showing up all over, but I like BoingBoing.net)

Tags:fishapod evolution creationism Intelligent Design

POWERED ARMOR!!!

Disabled Japanese to scale Swiss mountain aided by 'robot suits'

The battery-powered suit, code-named HAL, detects muscle movements through the natural electrical currents that pass over the surface of the skin and anticipates the next move. In this way, it aids movement and enhances the strength of the wearer.

POWERED ARMOR!!!
POWERED ARMOR!!!
POWERED ARMOR!!!
POWERED ARMOR!!!
POWERED ARMOR!!!
POWERED ARMOR!!!

Tags:Powered Armor Iron Man

Time Travelers say bye-bye

Time Travelers say bye-bye

"The Grandfather Paradox [where you go back in time and kill your grandfather] is not an issue," said Mallett. "“In a sense, time travel means that you're traveling both in time and into other universes. If you go back into the past, you'’ll go into another universe. As soon as you arrive at the past, you're making a choice and thereÂ’ll be a split. Our universe will not be affected by what you do in your visit to the past."

So, basically, traveling back in time means you vanish from our universe.
No way to return (so it seems).
I suppose that might be OK for the traveler (whatever universe they end up in might be close enough to home that they don't care), but really, everyone else is saying goodbye to them.
Thats sort of...sad.

Tags:Time Travel

RIAA says 'Drop Out Of MIT'

RIAA says 'Drop Out Of MIT'

But as much as I tried to argue that I was in as unique a situation as someone with medical expenses, there was no getting through. Bowie even had the audacity to say, “In fact, the RIAA has been known to suggest that students drop out of college or go to community college in order to be able to afford settlements.

Now, regardless of how you feel about the RIAA's campaign against music piracy (note:I agree with them conceptually...these people ARE stealing music), this
is, of course, insane.
The dollar amounts are nothing to RIAA. They could, instead, have the person sign a contract stating that they'd never steal music again, and, if they did, THEN the fines would be imposed.
Doesn't that seem like a reasonable compromise rather than having someone drop out of school?
The bloodthirstiness of the RIAA helps no one.
Least of all the RIAA.
They need a lesson in human behavior.
The more you fuck with someone, the more likely they (or people who identify with them) are likely to fuck-back.

Tags:RIAA

International Conflict I Care Least About

Florida Hates London, London Smacks Back

(note, this apparently has been resolved, but still...)

FORT MYERS, Florida (AP) -- School officials in southwest Florida said terrorism concerns led them to keep a high school band from marching in a London parade, but now angry British officials are telling travelers that Fort Myers is no safe haven, either.

Local tourism officials fear the dispute could cost Lee County millions in tourism dollars, and even Florida Gov. Jeb Bush has commented, saying, "Perhaps the superintendent is being overly cautious in this regard."

Bush said Superintendent James Browder probably should have looked at the U.S. Department of State's travel advisory before declaring London unsafe for Fort Myers High School's band to march in London's 2007 New Year's Day parade.

District administrators nixed the trip in early March, citing the threat of terrorism in Europe -- especially the 2005 terrorist bombing of London's city buses and subway system, which killed 52 people.

On Friday, London parade officials released a statement to the News-Press of Fort Myers, warning British travelers about the city's crime and homicide rates, Lee County's record number of traffic deaths in 2005 and that the "entire area is prone to catastrophic hurricanes."

British media were expected to publish the statement Monday.

Browder said he's not changing his mind and the band should stay within the United States.

Tags:London Florida Band

Alpha-bits are dead to me.

Alas...
So, I used to love Alpha-Bits.
Alpha-bits, for those living in a box, are sugar coated, letter-shaped cheerios.
But no more.
New Alpha-Bits
The difference?
NO SUGAR!!!
Now they are just, well, letter-shaped Cheerios.
Whats the point?
I wanted to be funny with this post, but I'm too sad.

Tags:Alpha-bits cereal

Apologize for huging!

And here's one for the "You've Got To Be Fucking Kidding Me List"


Hugging is bad?

Seriously, guns in schools, pregnant kids, and this is what causes an issue

I can't even understand this.
I mean, its like reading a foreign language.
You recognize the letters, maybe, but...

Tags:schools People who should be firedsavannah Michael Marino Brenda Brier Mark Masterson

The Worst Religion Has To Offer

The Worst Religion Has To Offer (that doesn't include a gun or gas chamber)
my favorite bit:

Meanwhile, Lou Sheldon of the Traditional Values Coalition urged the abandonment of the terms “homosexual” and “gay” in favor of adopting terms such as “sodomites” and “the perverted ones.”

Exactly how is this crap any different than that whole thing with the Christian in Afghanistan?

Tags:religion christianity judaism

Clash = Terrorism

Singing The Clash Can Make You A Terrorist

The taxi driver had become worried on the way to the airport because Mann had been singing along to The Clash's 1979 anthem "London Calling," which features the lyrics "Now war is declared -- and battle come down" while other lines warn of a "meltdown expected."

And, of course, singing The Ramones' "I wanna be sedated" makes you a drug dealer

Tags:terrorism The Clash

Judas was a hero

Judas Did The Work Of Jesus

The key passage comes when Jesus tells Judas "you will exceed all of them. For you will sacrifice the man that clothed me."
...
National Geographic said the author of the gospel of Judas believed that Judas Iscariot alone understood the true significance of Jesus' teachings.

Tags:Judas Jesus Christianity gnosticism

Smallville Lawsuit

Siegel Sues Smallville

I dunno...probably won't wash, and it probably is greed, but given how completely screwed on Superman Jerry and Joe got, can you blame the family?


Tags:Superman Superboy Smallville Jerry Siegel Joe Shuster Comics

It's OK to beg

So, someone just came in with a form to buy pizzas as a fundraiser.
The point was to defer costs for Verizon to keep their DSL costs low so that
people don't go to, say, Comcast cable modems.
Bizarre, isn't it?
I mean, isn't that effectively begging?
Having worked in the non-profit world, I shudder to call this fundraising.

Now, substitute 'Expensive Day Care Provider' for 'Verizon' and 'Double strollers
and Outdoor equipment' for 'DSL'
hm.
Tags:fundraising begging day care Verizon DSL Comcast Cable Modem

Let Those People Go!

Its OK to be angry at them. They aren't white.

If you follow the links, you'll see that Rep. Goode is, in fact, one of those folks who think that the Civil War was a crime, but only because the south lost.
I still don't understand why we put up with this crap.
Nor do I understand the confusion southerners display when faced with the bad light others see them in.
I, personally, think we should allow the south to secede.
I wonder how long they'd last.
I figure, what, 6 months?
Then they'd come back begging.
And, better yet, we wouldn't have to make them states. They could be territories, which means NO VOTE FOR YOU!

South will rise again my ass.

Tags:Virgil H. Goode south racism immigration Southern secessionThe South can kiss my ass

POULTRYGEIST

New Troma Movie

It looks like everything I'd hope a zombie chicken movie from Troma called POULTRYGEIST would be.

'nuff said.

Tags:troma Poultrygeist

DIE CHRISTIAN DIE!!!

DIE CHRISTIAN DIE!!!


there's a great guardian article from a few years back relevant to this.

It's war - but it doesn't have to be dirty

My view on this article is:
1) man is a rational animal
2) sometimes, man gives up the burden of rationality in favor of a text. In this context, text means a book, or philosophy, or person, or whatever, that makes decisions for man.
Basically, any external source that tells the person what to do, without requiring thought on that person's part.
3) When that happens, man's entire reason/justification to exist becomes wrapped up in that text.
4) At that point, anyone who DOESN'T follow that text becomes an insult to that person and life as they know it.
5) And that insult is so profound that it cannot be endured. Death to the infidel becomes a very viable option

THIS is the problem with fundamentalist Islam right now. Even most fundamentalist christians don't entertain the idea of killing those who don't believe or who leave the faith. Granted, there are some wackos out there who bomb abortion clinics, and even more who, while they might not do it themselves, at least understand the motivation. But I believe that these are the minority.
If Islam wants to deal with the rest of the world, if Islam wants respect, then it has to return that respect.
I think its fine for a Muslim country to kick out someone who converts away from Islam (well, not 'fine' per se, but it is their right), but killing someone because of that, well, thats fascism. And not letting them leave to the west because that might cause lots of others to follow suit, well, thats fascism.
I wonder.
What would the Islamic world do if christians started killing people in the streets of America who converted to Islam.
Oh, wait, sorry, I forgot. Islam is always right and Jihad is fine.
My bad.
*sigh*
I have to remind myself constantly.
You can't MAKE a child grow up.
You can only hope to show them why they should.
Tags:Islam afghanistan christianity

Death To Christians

Top Muslim clerics: Convert must die

"We are a small country and we welcome the help the outside world is giving us. But please don't interfere in this issue," Nasri said. "We are Muslims and these are our beliefs. This is much more important to us than all the aid the world has given us."

This is insane.
So many in the Muslim world want to convince people they aren't, well, babarians.
They want respect from the rest of the world.
But this?
Fine.
Do this, and we'll see how much you like living without aid.
Do this, and confirm what the neo-cons say.
That at least some sections of Islam foster turning people into animals.
Tough titty.



Tags:islam christianity afghanistan Abdul Rahman

Women are incapable of rational thought

So, as you know, the women of South Dakota are unable to make choices for themselves:

Minimum Security

Luckily, a little sedition is goin on:

Oglala Sioux president will establish Planned Parenthood clinic on reservation

Tags:abortion South Dakota

Christianity can get you killed

Man may be executed for converting to Christianity

what a lovely job we've done in our Crusade

Tags:christianity afghanistan

Teacher sues for fart chair

from cnn.com

BRISTOL, England (AP) -- A British teacher who says a noisy chair made classroom life a misery is suing her former employer for unfair dismissal.

Sue Storer, 48, told an employment tribunal Tuesday she was subjected to sexist and bullying behavior while working as deputy head teacher at Bedminster Down Secondary School in Bristol, southwest England.

Storer said the school failed to replace her chair, which made a "farting" noise whenever anyone sat on it, although other staff received new chairs.

She said the chair was a source of embarrassment, especially at parent-teacher evenings.

She also said male colleagues were favored over her and she was placed under an unfair amount of pressure.

"I had a nervous breakdown because of the ordeal I went through. It's just not fair that people can treat you like that," said Storer, who resigned in September. She said she would never teach again.

She is seeking a ruling that the school's behavior amounted to unfair dismissal and sexual discrimination, as well as compensation for lost earnings. The tribunal is expected to rule within the next two weeks.

Copyright 2006 The Associated Press. All rights reserved.This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed.

Tags:fart sexual discrimination

The Silver Screen My Destination???

Alfred Bester's The Stars My Destination in talks???
*sigh* I read this book in college for a class being taught by Samuel Delany, if you can believe it.
A movie?
Could I be so lucky???
Well, yes.
Could I be so lucky as to see this made by people who know what they are doing, who love the work, and who are given the freedom to make it right?
That remains to be seen.
OOOOOO! Maybe after Ratner drives X3 into the ground he'll come and do this.
wheee.
splat.
Tags:Alfred Bester The Stars My Destination

Don't love Jesus? NO KID FOR YOU!

You can lose your kid for being critical of Christianity

The judge, allegedly a very strict Catholic, became outraged at the photos of the X-Day parody of Mel Gibsons movie The Passion of the Christ especially the photo where Jesus [Steve Bevilacqua] is wearing clown makeup and carrying a crucifix with a pool-noodle dollar sign on it while being beaten by a crowd of SubGenii, including a topless woman with a dildo.
...
The judge ordered that Rachel is to have absolutely no contact with her son, not even in writing, because he felt the pictures of X-Day performance art were evidence enough to suspect "severe mental illness".

Now, it does warrant mentioning the woman in question does appear in these pictures wearing skimpy clothing, or totally nude. However, her child has never been to this event. It also warrants mentioning that the parody sounds pretty stupid.

That said..This judge has gone way over the line here. The good thing is that there's no way that this will stand up assuming this girl's performance art wasn't, say, getting fucked by a sheep. The bad thing is that it will probably costa lott of money. Ugh.
I really do hope this guy gets kicked from the bench.
Along with everyone who thinks you can't be a good parent if you are gay.
Along with everyone who puts their own agenda ahead of the welfare of the child.

Anyhow, all for today.


Tags:jesus Church Of The SubGenius Rachel Bevilacqua Magdalen Civil Liberties Religion J. R. "Bob" Dobbs

More Imaginary World Issues

xxx Domain Retuns
Now, don't get me wrong, I oppose the xxx domain because it is, at heart, useless. As the article says, it's only useful if you force every porn site to use it, but determining what is porn can be problematic. The article sites Boing Boing, but that aside, there's people who would want adult sites that aren't porn to be put there. Any site regarding sexuality, discussions about homosexuality, STDs, etc. These are the same kind of sites that cause problems with filtering systems in libraries.
And while I sympathize with parents who don't want their kids seeing this stuff (whether reasonably so or just due to being closed minded and fearful), it is hardly appropriate for it to be shuffled off to howtopreventstds.xxx or tellyourparentsyouaregay.xxx.
How does this tie into my earlier topic?

However the other group fighting it, surprisingly, were a group of "family values" types who felt that somehow setting up a red light district online legitimized online porn.

Again, what we see is the wonderful thought process called denial: If we REALLY hope it isn't there, then it must not be there.
This is, of course, the same kind of thought process that people diagnosed as terminally ill go through.
We have to accept that the world is not perfect. We don't give up the dream of making it perfect, but we can't just wish it away.
People do stupid things.
People have risky sex.
People have abortions.
Wishing won't get rid of this.
If you want to stop abortions, wouldn't it make sense to create a world where they wouldn't be needed?
No, thats not very realistic either, HOWEVER, what is realisitc is creating a world where they would be kept to a minimum.
Give people knowledge and information so they can prevent the pregnancy in the first place.
Create a world where girls in high school know how to not get prengant, and, if they do, at least won't get kicked out of their home, their school, etc. That their lives won't end with a child.
Create a state where a single, unwed mother can afford to raise a child without living one notch above the street.
Create an environment where a family can support itself without living in fear.
To simply say that:
1) if we don't talk about sex, sex won't happen
2) if we deny people the ability to have safe sex, they won't have sex at all
is crazy.

Tags:sex porn .xxx

More Security Updates

WOOF

Especially now that AIBO support has been discontinued...

Tags:AIBO jindo arin dogs robots